It's been almost a year an I still think about it every day. It's so hard to love someone and hate them at the same time for what they did. How long does this shit take to get over?!
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Damn bro sorry to hear that.
I don't know how long it takes to get over....................if by over we mean being able to move on.................however I think there are some things in this life that we should never fully get over in the sense that we are never ok with the fact that it happened or that it stops mattering to us.
That said, I do hope you are able to move on soon with compassion and bit of wisdom to boot.When it's my time to go, I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my uncle did....... Not screaming in terror like his passengers -
The simplest answer is it takes as long as it takes.
Every relationship is different. I've been through it before as I imagine other people have here too. I don't know if you ever fully ever get over it but you do learn to accept it and move on with the rest of your life.Comment
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I might be wrong... but you've said everything is ok now...Originally posted by Condor View Post
Anyway here's my opinion ... I'm slightly younger but had to get over a 10 year relationship (we've got a 6 year old son as well)
At some point you HAVE to become friends and forget about the HATE...
Trust me ... hating someone will only destroy your KARMA in time....
Do this until it's not too late....
I know it sounds difficult but try to friends with your ex wife (there's no other way around)
And last but not least, if you haven't already done so.... try to find someone new ... and remake your life ... you'll slowly start to realize how stupid you are to care for someone that has betrayed/hurt/cheated on you.....
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Yeah it sucks! Took me about 8 years to get over it. But that's all far away in the past now. Things are much better than ever before. You're lucky you don't have kids with her. Just hang in there and count your blessings!Comment
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Everyone else has covered it pretty well, so I'll just say take care, and I wish you the best for the future :^)Comment
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Yes. Lots of good advice. I had to get over it quickly as I have two kids with the ex. We are almost back to being friendly.Comment
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I was married in '86... divorced in '96... never "got over it" but did get past it. We are friends and the other day she even texted me reminding me of our "would have been" 24th anniversary. So like others have said, you really dont get over it. Your better off being friends and just understanding that as much as you loved this person, being with them was not meant to be.
I think what kept me sane was that I immediately forgave my ex-wife (as I think she did me, we were both at fault for different reasons) and we became friends after our divorce. We turned out to be better friends that lovers anyway. So dont hold the hate in, forgive, and move on.Comment
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It gets better with time. As mentioned, there is no magic equation for how much time it will take to move on. The quicker you can get your mind out of the past and move forward, the better it gets day to day as in find new hobbies, relations, ect....Comment
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Sorry, man. I don't have any advice on the divorce front but you definitely sound like someone who can deal with the terrible shit life throws at you from time to time.
I'm struggling with staying positive myself but for other reasons. Gotta find a little bit of sunshine in every day. It's always there...just gotta find it.Comment
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Yeah I just had one of those nights. I don't hate her, she just makes me angry from time to time. There is no way we will be friends. Thanks all.Comment
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Then you simply let go, and ignore her...Originally posted by Condor View Post
That's the only way to stop her from bothering you..
Think about moving on with your life instead of making it even worse and actually letting her to bother you from time to time..Comment
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I left my ex in October of 2007. It's December of 2010 and I just met someone about a month ago. We've been seeing each other a month and this is the first time I haven't thought about the past or worried about it. Not that that helps, 3 years is a long time, but you have to get over it, and learn to love yourself before you can love someone else - and not worry so much about "why me" or "what did i do" (because I beat myself up over why our family fell apart), but look forward. Best wishes.Originally posted by Condor View PostComment
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