Shoot me, please...

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Judge: No More Cats for Florida Woman Whose 102 Cats Were Seized

A Florida judge has ruled that a woman who had 102 felines taken from her home can no longer own cats.
The ruling from Marion County Judge Thomas Thompson came Wednesday some six months after the county's animal control officers removed the cats from Diana Darnaby's home in nearby Summerfield.

(Excerpt) Read more at nbcmiami.com ...

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Woman Crashes Her Own Funeral; Confronts Husband Who Paid to Have Her Killed
PJ Media ^


An Australian woman whose partner of 10 years paid a hit team to murder her shocked the man by showing up at her own funeral.
Noela Rukundo's story is the stuff of a Lifetime miniseries. But it's the reaction of her husband when he saw her after believing she was dead that is more priceless than anything MasterCard can come up with.

Finally, she spotted the man she'd been waiting for. She stepped out of her car, and her husband put his hands on his head in horror.

"Is it my eyes?" she recalled him saying. "Is it a ghost?"
"Surprise! I'm still alive!" she replied.
Far from being elated, the man looked terrified. Five days earlier, he had ordered a team of hit men to kill Rukundo, his partner of 10 years. And they did -- well, they told him they did. They even got him to pay an extra few thousand dollars for carrying out the crime.
Now here was his wife, standing before him. In an interview with the BBC on Thursday, Rukundo recalled how he touched her shoulder to find it unnervingly solid. He jumped. Then he started screaming.
"I'm sorry for everything," he wailed.
But it was far too late for apologies; Rukundo called the police. The husband, Balenga Kalala, ultimately pleaded guilty and was sentenced to nine years in prison for incitement to murder, according to the Australian Broadcasting Corp. (the ABC).
Noela's ordeal began a year ago when she traveled to Burundi to attend the funeral of her mother-in-law. Afterwards, her husband suggested she go out for some air and when she did, she was attacked by three men who blindfolded her and drove to a secluded location. There, they tied her to a chair and informed her that her husband had paid them to kill her.
When she didn't believe them, they called the husband who ordered them to murder her. But, for reasons that still aren't clear, they didn't. The hit men claim they didn't kill women and besides, they knew Noela's brother.
Her escape from Burundi was not easy:

Shaken, but alive and doggedly determined, Rukundo began plotting her next move. She sought help from the Kenyan and Belgian embassies to return to Australia, according to The Age. Then she called the pastor of her church in Melbourne, she told the BBC, and explained to him what had happened. Without alerting Kalala, the pastor helped her get back home to her neighborhood near Melbourne.

Meanwhile, her husband had told everyone she had died in a tragic accident and the entire community mourned her at her funeral at the family home. On the night of Feb. 22, 2015, just as the widower Kalala waved goodbye to neighbors who had come to comfort him, Rukundo approached him, the very man whose voice she'd heard over the phone five days earlier, ordering that she be killed.
"I felt like somebody who had risen again," she told the BBC.
Though Kalala initially denied all involvement, Rukundo got him to confess to the crime during a phone conversation that was secretly recorded by police, according to The Age.
"Sometimes Devil can come into someone, to do something, but after they do it they start thinking, 'Why I did that thing?' later," he said, as he begged her to forgive him.
Kalala eventually pleaded guilty to the scheme. He was sentenced to nine years in prison by a judge in Melbourne.
We've all daydreamed about attending our own funeral. Reading the glowing obit. Watching the grieving family and relatives. My own fantasy is to actually write my own eulogy. After all, who knows me better than me?
But the burning satisfaction this woman must have felt when she saw the look of surprise, shock and horror on her husband's face redefines forever the term "schadenfreude."

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"Lost in Space" Nigerian E-Mail Scam ... Nigerian Astronaut Lost in Space Needs $3M to Get Home
Anorak ^ |

Nigerian astronaut lost in space needs $3m to get home - could be a scam
The Anorak Inbox features this plea: Nigerian Astronaut is lost in space needs $3Million to come home ...
Subject: Nigerian Astronaut Wants To Come Home
Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
National Space Research and Development Agency (NASRDA)
Plot 555
Misau Street
PMB 437
Garki, Abuja, FCT NIGERIA
Dear Mr. Sir,
REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE-STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL
I am Dr. Bakare Tunde, the cousin of Nigerian Astronaut, Air Force Major Abacha Tunde. He was the first African in space when he made a secret flight to the Salyut 6 space station in 1979. He was on a later Soviet spaceflight, Soyuz T-16Z to the secret Soviet military space station Salyut 8T in 1989. He was stranded there in 1990 when the Soviet Union was dissolved. His other Soviet crew members returned to earth on the Soyuz T-16Z, but his place was taken up by return cargo. There have been occasional Progrez supply flights to keep him going since that time. He is in good humor, but wants to come home.
In the 14-years since he has been on the station, he has accumulated flight pay and interest amounting to almost $ 15,000,000 American Dollars. This is held in a trust at the Lagos National Savings and Trust Association. If we can obtain access to this money, we can place a down payment with the Russian Space Authorities for a Soyuz return flight to bring him back to Earth. I am told this will cost $ 3,000,000 American Dollars. In order to access the his trust fund we need your assistance.
Consequently, my colleagues and I are willing to transfer the total amount to your account or subsequent disbursement, since we as civil servants are prohibited by the Code of Conduct Bureau (Civil Service Laws) from opening and/ or operating foreign accounts in our names.
Needless to say, the trust reposed on you at this juncture is enormous. In return, we have agreed to offer you 20 percent of the transferred sum, while 10 percent shall be set aside for incidental expenses (internal and external) between the parties in the course of the transaction. You will be mandated to remit the balance 70 percent to other accounts in due course.
Kindly expedite action as we are behind schedule to enable us include downpayment in this financial quarter.
Please acknowledge the receipt of this message via my direct number 234 (0) 9-234-2220 only.
Yours Sincerely, Dr. Bakare Tunde Astronautics Project Manager tip@nasrda.gov.ng
http://www.nasrda.gov.ng/

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Chef Drops Foie Gras From Menu After Vegan Death Threats



Vegan activists threatened a restaurant in the United Kingdom over its Valentine's Day menu

A chef in the United Kingdom is backing away from including foie gras on a Valentine's Day menu after receiving death threats from vegan activists.

The chef at Kings Arms at Fleggburgh opted out of serving the decadent dish during Valentine's Day dinner this weekend after being subjected to "harassment" by activists who threatened to protest the menu, the Guardian reports. Foie gras is traditionally made by force feeding geese until their liver becomes enlarged.

(Excerpt) Read more at time.com ...

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Man Arrested for Alleged Sex Act on Las Vegas Strip Ferris Wheel

...Was Set to Marry Another Woman That Day

A man who was arrested after he and another woman allegedly had sex on a Ferris wheel above the Las Vegas strip opened up about the incident, telling a local television station in an interview on Friday that he was set to have married another woman that day. Chloe Scordianos and Philip Panzica were pictured in booking photos.
Chloe Scordianos and Philip Panzica were pictured in booking photos.
Philip Panzica went to Las Vegas with fiance Mistie Bozant to tie the knot last Friday, according to KTNV. The couple met two months before.
But things didnt go as planned when Panzica, believing Bozant was pregnant with another mans child, ended up gambling and drinking "four or five" margaritas instead.
That’s when he met Chloe Scordianos, the woman he was later arrested with on the High Roller.
"One thing led to another. She was there by herself," Panzica said in an interview, with Bozant by his side.

(Excerpt) Read more at ktla.com ...

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Man skips work for 6 years; no one notices

A 69-year-old Spanish man was fined this week after officials discovered he hadn't shown up to work for at least six years, the Guardian reports. Ironically, the civil servant was discovered only when the deputy mayor attempted to give him an award for 20 years of "loyal and dedicated" service in 2010. I thought, where is this man?" the Guardianquotes the deputy mayor. "Is he still there? Has he retired? Has he died?

(Excerpt) Read more at khou.com ...

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Kim Jong Un broadcasts 'Master Chef'-style cooking competition while North Korea starves

Kim Jong Un broadcasts 'Master Chef'-style cooking competition while North Korea starves
Published April 22, 2016
Cheese-chomping despot Kim Jong Un held a “Master Chef”-style competition to find North Korea’s top cooks as millions across the nation starve.
The Emmental-obsessed dictator gave the show, which was broadcast on state TV, the green light despite an estimated two-thirds of the country’s 27 million people surviving on food rations.
The Commie connoisseur developed a love of European cheeses and fine wines when he went to school in Switzerland.
But the tubby tyrant was served decidedly different fare during the contest as competitors served up terrapin stew and grey mullet fish soup.
More than 1,000 people entered the competition, with the Pyongyang Times reporting: “The festival was comprised of the exhibitions of gastrological [sic] hits, famous and local special dishes and compulsory dishes and the technical contest and demonstration of top chefs and waiters and waitresses.

(Excerpt) Read more at foxnews.com ...

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It's XXXXXXXXL UK: Obesity crisis sweeping Britain is laid bare as demand soars for 8XL waistbands

The obesity crisis sweeping Britain is now so acute that dozens of shops are selling XXXXXXXXL size clothes.
A huge 8XL T-shirt would fit an incredible 80in chest and 80in waist – the equivalent of almost seven feet in circumference.
Demand for supersize clothes has increased so much in recent years that one in ten items now sold in plus size stores is 8XL

(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...

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Man follows woman into restroom after mistaking her for a man

FRISCO -- It was an unsettling bathroom counter that Jessica Rush will never forget.
Rush was inside a bathroom Thursday at Baylor Medical Center in Frisco when a man barged into the women’s bathroom because he thought she was a male.
“You didn’t look like a girl when I saw you enter. I thought you was a…,” the man told her.
“A boy?” she asked him.
“Yes, I was kind of confused when I saw this,” the unidentified man. “That’s the only reason. Now that I see you are a woman. … You know it’s difficult. Of course, you dress like a man. You dress like a man.”

(Excerpt) Read more at wfaa.com ...

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Yearbook Prank Lands High School Student Felony Charge

An Arizona high school student is facing a felony charge after police say he exposed himself in a football team picture that ended up in the school yearbook.
Mesa police say 19-year-old Hunter Osborn was arrested after they were alerted to the picture over the weekend. A police document says the Red Mountain High School team photo shows Osborn exposing his penis through the top of his waistband.

(Excerpt) Read more at krqe.com ...

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‘Flasher’ On Bus Gets Beating From Angry Women
Yahoo News ^ |

This is the moment a group of angry women confronted an alleged flasher on a packed bus.
The man is believed to have revealed his genitals to a passenger on the busy vehicle in Turkey. The horrified woman is seen reacting to the incident by slapping and shouting at the man – and not long after others join in.
The man was later arrested and charged with assault after he was grabbed by the passengers when he tried to flee the bus The man was arrested after the bus stopped (CEN)
The incident happened in Turkey’s north-western Kocaeli Province.
The 34-year-old, identified only by his initials AEA, is seen being confronted by his victim after he allegedly showed her his private parts.
However, as more attention is drawn to the man, who does not react, others join in – even kicking him

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Boston traffic reporter comes out as a woman

The familiar voice coming over the radios of tens of thousands of Boston area drivers on the way to work Wednesday was the same. But the name had changed.
WBZ-AM traffic reporter Scott Eck signed off as Kristen Eck for the first time, another step in a decades-long struggle with her gender identity. […]
… (A)lthough Eck, 45, was aware of the heightened public interest, her decision to live as a woman was deeply personal. She said she knew at age 5 she was supposed to be a girl. …

(Excerpt) Read more at hosted.ap.org ...

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Caitlyn Jenner to Pose Naked With Gold Medal for 'Sports Illustrated'

Now that’s a patriotic streak!
Caitlyn Jenner will appear on a summer cover of Sports Illustrated wearing “nothing but an American flag and her Olympic medal,” a source reveals in the latest issue of Us Weekly.
The 66-year-old I Am Cait star (formerly known as Bruce) set a world decathlon record at the 1976 Montreal Summer Games. To celebrate the 40th anniversary of her win, she’ll pose with her gold medal for the first time post-transition, adds the source: “She’s excited about that.” (Her ex-wife Kris appeared topless with a medal during a 2007 photo shoot on Keeping Up With the Kardashians.)
Until now, Jenner says, she had stashed her “most prized possession” at the bottom of her makeup drawer.
“I never wanted my kids to feel like they had to have a gold medal in order to be considered a success,” the father of Kylie, 18, Kendall, 20, Brody, 32, Brandon, 34, Casey, 35, and Burt, 37, wrote in an August 2015 blog post. “I didn’t want them to constantly compare their own achievements to my time in the Olympics, so I haven’t displayed my medal.”

(Excerpt) Read more at usmagazine.com ...

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45 people shot, 6 fatally, over Mother’s Day weekend

Six men were killed and at least 39 other people have been wounded in shootings across the city over Mother’s Day weekend.

The latest homicide happened Sunday morning in the Park Manor neighborhood on the South Side.

Kourtney Young, 21, suffered multiple gunshot wounds about 8:45 a.m. in the 7600 block of South Prairie and was taken to Stroger Hospital, where he was pronounced dead at 9:35 a.m., according to Chicago Police and the Cook County medical examiner’s office.

Young lived in the 7300 block of South King Drive, authorities said. Police did not immediately have details on the circumstances of the shooting.

Earlier Sunday, a 35-year-old man was shot to death while riding in a car on Lake Shore Drive on the North Side.

(Excerpt) Read more at chicago.suntimes.com ...

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Vegan restaurant owners receive death threats after being discovered eating meat
Hot Air.com ^

Let’s finish out the weekend with a story about Californians being Californians, because… California. Terces and Matthew Engelhart have made quite the life for themselves out on the left coast over the past decade, having established a small chain of “organic, plant-based” restaurants which specialize in completely vegan food. They apparently attract Hollywood celebrities who are impressed not only by the business ethic of their eateries, but the “Love Farm” where they raise much of their produce, presumably in a Gaia approved fashion. They’ve published a book which explains the tenets of their “sacred enterprise” which is a must read for the nature loving set.
And now they’re receiving death threats… not from some evil, radical right wing carnivore crew, but from their own customers. It turns out that the Engelharts have betrayed the goddess entirely and gone back to eating meat. (Washington Post)

Recently, animal rights activists unearthed the unthinkable, as far as vegan icons are concerned: a blog post announcing the Engelharts’ “transition” to eating meat after 40 years of vegetarianism. The post was published more than a year ago, but it had slipped past the notice of most, buried in a series of ruminations on the website for the couple’s Be Love Farm, in Vacaville, Calif…
Accompanying photos showed several Mason jars filled to the brim with beef broth, as well as a freezer stuffed with pastured beef — “our pastured beef.”

The response has been incredible. Boycotts, death threats and denouncements from the high priests of veganism. (That’s a thing, right?) You need to read the full article just for the quotes of the wounded soldiers of the left who are ready to engage in some very non-loving activity by essentially nailing the Engelharts’ hides to their own barn roof.
For their part, the owners offer a variety of reasons for returning to an omnivorous lifestyle after nearly forty years of living on twigs and roots, none of which are terribly comprehensible. They talk about preserving their own mortality, but I was left unsure whether that meant that the vegan lifestyle was affecting their health or they were simply so sick of kale that they were about to hang themselves. They also launch into a lengthy explanation of how cows are important to the planet because their presence makes the plants grow and… and… I guess that means you need to kill them and eat them?
None of this really bothers me except the inherent phoniness of needing to justify having a hamburger. How about just because it tastes good? Or perhaps because you looked at your teeth in the mirror and remembered that you were designed to chew and digest both plants and animals? Or maybe you just really didn’t like the look on the cow’s face. Whatever, my friends. Let’s just fire up the grill and get the steaks ready.
I only point this story out because I recently saw another news item which claimed that the San Andreas fault line was primed and ready to let loose The Big One any day now, possibly dropping portions of the Golden State into the Pacific. I personally have my doubts about the ability of seismologists to predict earthquakes with that level of accuracy just yet, but in case it does happen, just think back on the reaction of all the patrons of these vegan restaurants. You’ll probably grieve a little less after the waves from the ensuing tsunami subside.