Why Parents Drink

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  • bmwgsa
    Member
    • Jul 2008
    • 248

    Why Parents Drink

    A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up.

    Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.'

    With the worst premonit ion he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.


    Dear Dad:

    It is with great regret and sor row that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.


    But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am.

    But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

    Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.

    Love,
    Your Son Cody,

    P..S.. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just
    wanted to remind you that there are worse things i n life than the report
    card that's in my center desk drawer..

    I love you. Call me when it' s safe to come home..
  • Raddleman

    #2
    rofl, man that's bad.

    Comment

    • slartie
      Member
      • Feb 2009
      • 94

      #3
      An oldie, but always hilarious! Thanks for sharing!

      Comment

      • Messiah
        Member
        • Feb 2009
        • 87

        #4
        new one for me and pretty funny

        Comment

        • Xobeloot
          Member
          • Jan 2008
          • 2542

          #5
          I haven't seen that one in years. Love it!

          Comment

          • Icebear
            New Member
            • Feb 2009
            • 12

            #6
            ROTFLMAO Never heard that one. Nice share.

            Comment

            • GoldenBoy
              Member
              • Mar 2009
              • 21

              #7
              lol I just heared that on TV a few weeks ago, you just made my day/night again. Thanks!

              Comment

              • PrisMaster
                Member
                • May 2007
                • 208

                #8
                lol thats great. I could have used that quite a few times.

                Comment

                • Judge Faust
                  Member
                  • Jan 2009
                  • 196

                  #9
                  Re: Why Parents Drink

                  Originally posted by Judge Fuast
                  Why doesn't that post surprize me? The state of mind of the typical american teenager is overly stunted by self gratification. Under the superior rule of communism our children admit defete and accept parental punishment with honor and dignity. Then we hide and cry like babies under the blanket of communism rule.
                  If you are going to pretend to be me, you could at least take the time to not spell like an illiterate helot... And let's not even mention the crimes against basic English grammar...

                  Comment

                  • lxskllr
                    Member
                    • Sep 2007
                    • 13435

                    #10
                    Re: Why Parents Drink

                    Originally posted by Judge Faust
                    Originally posted by Judge Fuast
                    Why doesn't that post surprize me? The state of mind of the typical american teenager is overly stunted by self gratification. Under the superior rule of communism our children admit defete and accept parental punishment with honor and dignity. Then we hide and cry like babies under the blanket of communism rule.
                    If you are going to pretend to be me, you could at least take the time to not spell like an illiterate helot... And let's not even mention the crimes against basic English grammar...
                    LMAO!!

                    This stuff is comedy gold :^D

                    Comment

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