My Journey......Mrs. Butterworth, 128 years of hard waffles

[Frosted]

"Oh God, I think I'm going to explode any second"! I told my girlfriend. "On my tits" she whispered, "do it on my tits" "Really? You sure"? "Yes! Quickly!! For me" "Oh ok then.....it's cominnnnnng..."Anyway, the moral of the story is - if you've got diarrhoea, it's best to be specific!

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lol, Frosty....you just ain't right mate.








50 Shades of grey

Four guys have been going to the same fishing trip for many years.
Two days before the group is to leave, Kevin's wife puts her foot down ...and tells him he isn't going.
Kevin's mates are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do.

Two days later the three mates get to the camping site only to find Kevin sitting there with a tent set up, firewood gathered, and dinner cooking on the fire.
"Shit ,Kevin how long you been here? How did you talk your missus into letting you go ?"

"Well, I've been here since last night. After dinner at home yesterday evening, I was sitting in my chair and my wife came up behind me and put her hands over my eyes and said, 'Guess who ?'"
I pulled her hands off, and she was wearing sexy brand new lingerie. She said had been reading 'Fifty Shades of Grey' and she had a devilish look in her eyes!!!
She took my hand and led me to our bedroom. The room had candles and rose petals all over.
On the bed she had handcuffs, and ropes !
She told me to tie her up and cuff her to the bed, so I did.

And then she said, "Do whatever you want."

So . . . . here I am !

[Frosted]

Squeezy strutting his stuff

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[Duff338]

PP I never comment in this thread, but read it daily and have read all of the current 45 pages....Thanks for the laughs

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Glad you enjoy my posts Duff. I post here mainly to keep my brain sharp and in shape...........

[Frosted]

Paddy pulls up at a red light beside a gorgeous young woman, smiles at her and lowers his window.

The woman smiles back and also lowers her window.


"Ah," says Paddy, "so you farted too?"

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time to infuse a bit of culture here.

shakespear, of course.........

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Last Saturday afternoon, in Washington, D.C., an aide to Nancy Pelosi visited the Bishop of the Catholic cathedral in D.C.

He told the Cardinal that Nancy Pelosi would be attending the next day's Mass, and he asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Pelosi to the congregation and say a few words that would include calling Pelosi a saint.



The Cardinal replied, "No. I don't really like the woman, and there are issues of conflict with
the Catholic Church over certain of Pelosi's views."



Pelosi's aide then said, "Look, I'll write a check here and now for a donation of $100,000 to your church if you'll just tell the congregation you see Pelosi as a saint."



The Cardinal thought about it and said, "Well, the church can use the money, so I'll work your request into tomorrow's sermon."


As Pelosi's aide promised, Nancy Pelosi appeared for the Sunday worship and seated herself prominently at the forward left side of the center aisle.



As promised, at the start of his sermon, the Cardinal pointed out that Ms. Pelosi was present.



The Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, "While Ms. Pelosi's presence is probably an honor to some, the woman is not numbered among my personal favorite personages. Some of her most egregious views are contrary to tenets of the Church, and she tends to flip- flop on many other issues. Nancy Pelosi is a petty, self -absorbed hypocrite, a thumb sucker, and a nit-wit. Nancy Pelosi is also a serial liar, a cheat, and a thief. I must say, Nancy Pelosi is the
worst example of a Catholic I have ever personally witnessed. She married for money and is using her wealth to lie to the American people. She also has a reputation for shirking her Representative obligations both in Washington and in California. The woman is simply not to be trusted."


The Cardinal concluded, "But, when compared with President Obama, Ms. Pelosi is a saint."

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