Perks of age....

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  • blotgode
    Member
    • Apr 2009
    • 338

    Perks of age....

    Perks of reaching 50, or being over 60 and heading towards 70! or 90????

    01 Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

    02. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

    03 No one expects you to run--anywhere.

    04. People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?

    05 People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

    06. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

    07 Things you buy now won't wear out.

    08. You can eat supper at 4 pm.

    09 You can live without sex but not your glasses.

    10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

    11 You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

    12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in- no matter who walks into the room.

    13 You sing along with elevator music.

    14. Your eyes won't get much worse.

    15 . Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

    16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

    17 Your secrets are safe with your friends- because, they can't remember them either.

    18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

    19 You can't remember who sent you this list.

    And you notice these are all in Big Print for your convenience.

    And Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night!

    _______________________________________________________ _____
    :wink:
  • justintempler
    Member
    • Nov 2008
    • 3090

    #2
    LOL :lol:

    Comment

    • RRK
      Member
      • Sep 2009
      • 926

      #3
      I've got a meteorologist knee and I'm only 31.

      Comment

      • Premium Parrots
        Super Moderators
        • Feb 2008
        • 9758

        #4
        its sad but true
        Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I killed because they were annoying......





        I've been wrong lots of times.  Lots of times I've thought I was wrong only to find out that I was right in the beginning.


        Comment

        • sheilalynn
          Member
          • May 2009
          • 1103

          #5
          I've definitely gotten more out of the health care insurance premiums than I've paid in...and that's even back in my 20's :wink: The body stopped wanting to cooperate at a very young age...stupid thing

          Comment

          • Karanya
            Member
            • Oct 2009
            • 402

            #6
            Hilarious, I didn't realize it was REALLY in large print until I read it on another computer. The print size matched my minimum-allowed font size...

            --K

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