Funny little real life story; Canoe Trip-2010

[Christi]

Ok, I will try not to keep this post really long.

Last summer my husband, reluctantly, talked me into going to Eminence Mo to go canoeing. Mind all of you I am a pretty big girl so I was really nervous about the whole canoe experience(esp since I had never been). If any of you are familiar with the two rivers you will know when I say that Jack's Fork was def. not the best choice for me since I was a beginner. I had no choice. We went with a group (of people I didn't know, had never met) and they had all decided to go down that particular river.

Before I even got into the boat I was wet. I fell out getting in along the rivers edge(embarrassing). Then about 5 min into the float a huge ass tree was sticking out of the water(and I was up front)...anyone guess what I did? I abandoned ship, yup, jumped right out nearly drowning my husband in the process. Everyone stopped so we could re-group and I was shaking so badly I could hardly breathe. It was about 9am by now so I cracked open a beer to try to calm my nerves. That one didn't help but by the 5th one 4 min later I was ok.

The rest of the first 1/2 I was golden, then they all stopped to eat lunch. Some how I lost my buzz and was having a horrible time helping steer. My husbands sister and her husband and his dad ended up joining us last min for the trip as they only lived in IL and it was a short drive. That made me happy but as it turned out his sister and her husband were worse in the canoe than myself and my husband. They were directly in front of us in a current stuck on a tree and couldn't get out. We couldn't stop.....so my bright-ass husband decides that our boat would push them out of the tree only to tump us over getting both our boats stuck in the limbs. I was caught between our boat and a sharp limb that was sticking me in the side. Finally all the young kids that were in our group turned back and it took 8 men to get both boats out of the tree.

I am sitting on the sand bar crying and saying how I will NEVER EVER be back to do this EVER again. We finished the rest of the trip and I never fell out again.

Point, I am going back...LOL

This year we rented our cabin and I am taking my brother and sister in law as well as my best good friend. They are all hell bent on going down the same F*CKING river so I am screwed unless I get good and drunk and don't eat. I saw snakes for god's sake :shock:

Now if anyone of my snuson friends live near by or want to join us please feel free to come along to watch me make a fool out of myself on the river. We are staying at Shady Lane Cabin's right off of 19 on July 10th, 11th and 12th. You bring the snus and I will bring myself for your entertainment. Make sure to bring your camera so you can upload it all to youtube or send to AFV and will thousands of dollars.

http://www.shadylanecabins.com/maps.html

EDIT:
If you have any tips or suggestions to make my trip less painful please, please feel free to share them. Last year I tried to take a beach chair on the canoe to sit in and that was a disaster. I also wore horrible water shoes, I would rather not wear them if at all possible. I am not sure flip flops are the best idea because of my past *falling out of the boat and all*. I want to have a camera on board, but not my $400 one. Tried the disposable kind last year and well lets just say I didn't come home with it. So maybe camera is a no, period.

[lxskllr]

Sounds like fun :^)

A couple of pointers... Don't EVER pilot your boat into a downed tree. They're called strainers, because they let the water through, but little else. Water's relentless, and you could end up stuck in the strainer under water which would make for a very bad day ;^)

Kneeling in the canoe's where it's at. If there's space under the seat for your legs, kneeling lowers your center of gravity, and give more power to your stroke. It helps to have microfoam glued to the bottom where your knees will be. Rest your butt on the seat.

I always wore boots paddling, but that's not common. They do make some tactical style water boots I always wanted to get, but never did. Boots give you ankle support and protection on slippery rocks. I never liked the neoprene water shoes, and flip flops can go to hell.

If you want to take a camera, I'd take a water resistant disposable. If you want to take a good camera, pack it in a dry bag, and clip it to the boat.

Take rope. It's useful for unsticking stuck boats, and general use. Use polypropylene. That kind floats which is what you want. Sinking rope is hard to use, and can be dangerous to work with.

I don't know what kind of river that is, but it might be a good idea to take it easy on the alcohol. Rapids+heavy buzz can be a very bad day. Shit happens quick on the river, and you need your wits in a stressful situation. Beer's better for the end of the day.

If you're doing rapids, a swift water rescue course wouldn't be a bad idea. There's some serious hazards on the water that look benign to the uninitiated. One of the biggest is a lowhead dam. That's a dam that crosses the river, but is only a couple feet high. No big deal, right? Well the lowhead dam can have a nasty recirculating current right below, and you, and/or your boat can get stuck. By stuck, I mean you can get pulled under, pop up a few feet down stream, then get pulled back to the dam and under water again. That goes on until you get tired and drown. Some dams are inescapable, some are easily escaped, and some are escaped with quite a bit of work, and scare. It takes an experienced eye to tell what it'll be, and for someone new to boating, the smart thing is to carry around it.

[Roo]

Dam lx, that's a whole heap of great advice. I love canoeing, and rivers, and rafting or boating in general. Too bad I don't have a canoe/kayak/boat of my own. But I jump at any chance to rent or borrow Christi, despite being the serious beer-drinker that I am, I definitely gotta side with lxskllr here. If you fall in *after* 5 beers, the unthinkable is 5 times more likely to happen. Be safe, and pound beers around the fire at day's end, on the high and dry.

[Christi]

Dam lx, that's a whole heap of great advice. I love canoeing, and rivers, and rafting or boating in general. Too bad I don't have a canoe/kayak/boat of my own. But I jump at any chance to rent or borrow Christi, despite being the serious beer-drinker that I am, I definitely gotta side with lxskllr here. If you fall in *after* 5 beers, the unthinkable is 5 times more likely to happen. Be safe, and pound beers around the fire at day's end, on the high and dry.

We are talking Class 1 and some small area's of Class 2 water here. Everyone drinks when they go. You can look at the river any point in the day and see coolers floating along side tubes or people with beer cans in their hands. It is NOT rapids at all. Very small currents and for the most part very peace full. Don't take away the alcohol it was the only thing that kept me sane :P

I appreciate all the advice guys. I am for sure getting that rope lx. And as for the boots, I will do some research because I like the fact that they support ankles. I probably won't bother with a camera, we will have to wait and see.

[lxskllr]

For boots, you can look at thrift shops and WalMart to save some money. I wore leather boots when I went. It trashed them of course, and they were stiff as a board when you put them on next, but they were very comfortable once they got wet. Pair them with medium-heavy weight wool socks. I actually prefer real leather to synthetics. Synthetics smell like ass when they get wet. They don't degenerate in water like leather does though.

[Christi]

I will be on the lookout for some good boots. My husband will wear those dumb water shoes again I am sure. I hated them because all the rocks got stuck in them and they were super un-comfy.

Thanks for the great advice. If I take pics I will post them so you can see. It is very pretty there. I am hoping that Friday night we will camp instead of rent the cabin all weekend, my friend knows a spot where we can see wild horses and I would love that.