Love Poems [from the heart and other vital organs]

[Premium Parrots]

(Sung to the tune of The Beverly Hillbillies theme)

Come and listen to my story bout my girlfriend rose
A gal you can't trust any farther than you throw
When we first met I believed her love was true
But all that got me was a pot of the Blue
(Ointment, that is. Rub it on. OOOH that stings)

Well the next thing ya know I showed her the door
Then she called up talkin sweet like the way she did before
I soon found out that she didn't sleep alone
And she brought more than clothes into our happy home
(Gonorrhea, that is. Gift that keeps ON givin. Grrr.)

Now y'all don't worry cause soon we'll be man and wife
Rose will have to be faithful for the rest of her life
Cause the last time that she and I got into a tiff
I didn't sleep alone, and now we have the syph!
(Syphilis, that is. French disease. Don't worry, Rose,
I'll take care of you.)

[lawofficegirl]

Re: Love Poems [from the heart and other vital organs]

(Sung to the tune of The Beverly Hillbillies theme)

Come and listen to my story bout my girlfriend rose
A gal you can't trust any farther than you throw
When we first met I believed her love was true
But all that got me was a pot of the Blue
(Ointment, that is. Rub it on. OOOH that stings)

Well the next thing ya know I showed her the door
Then she called up talkin sweet like the way she did before
I soon found out that she didn't sleep alone
And she brought more than clothes into our happy home
(Gonorrhea, that is. Gift that keeps ON givin. Grrr.)

Now y'all don't worry cause soon we'll be man and wife
Rose will have to be faithful for the rest of her life
Cause the last time that she and I got into a tiff
I didn't sleep alone, and now we have the syph!
(Syphilis, that is. French disease. Don't worry, Rose,
I'll take care of you.)

LMAO! too funny

[Premium Parrots]

This one is so very touching.....


If I were you, in love with me I would be,
While we're together, I rarely go pee.
The only reason that I must restrain,
For when I'm left from you, I feel so much pain.
But not the pain like a kick in the junk,
More like the pain when I lose at Kerplunk.
If we ever broke up, I'd be oh so lost,
Probably from all the pornography costs.
As much as I love to watch women get wild,
You're the woman I want to carry my child.

You're more gorgeous than vomit, your hair is so straight.
Together forever, wouldn't that be great?
For my feelings for you, how powerful are,
I'd drive a kilometer...isn't that far?
The way that you smile while we eat our meals,
Nicer than Eskimos murdering seals.
Your hunchback is pretty, so pleasant and plump,
Unlike the hemorrhoid that covers your rump.
I can look past that, the pusing and spewing,
As long as the kinky dates don't involve chewing!

I think now, my love, you know how I feel.
I'd rather kiss you than watch human flesh peel.
If I could take you out for one more night on the town,
It would be more fun than guessing who's poop has more brown.
So give it some thought and then let me know,
If you love me as well, if so we will go.
We'll leave this place fast and go travel together,
Please pardon my package, as it must be cold weather.
The thing that I find I love most about you,
Is your humour is funnier than Winnie The Pooh.
Well, maybe not Winnie himself, exactly.
But possibly where he gets honey from...that tree!
Yes, it is true, your humour excels,
That of inanimate objects or wells.

More compliments, yes, I could go on for hours,
But after thinking of you, I must take a cold shower.
Not for those perverted reasons you think,
But merely because it feels good when I blink.
I'll end this poetry session right now,
I truly do love you, more than a cow.