Psychologists

[WickedKitchen]

I've been gone for a week. I'm going through a personal struggle right now. I'm talking addiction and breaking it, and I'm also not talking about nicotine. The withdrawals are terrible. It's not like cocaine or heroine or anything but it's very hard to deal. Sleep has been almost non existent for a week now.

I have a very loving and supportive wife, thank God. I wouldn't want to do it without her support.

My question is: Does anyone have experience with a psychologist?

I will be making an appointment to see one soon to make sure I'm on the right track with my personal healing but I don't know what to expect. I have a very negative outlook on this as my family had a bad experience with one when I was a child and my brother had a problem. It's blackened the profession for me yet I can't say that I have firsthand knowledge of how the sessions actually work. I only know what I've been told. I think that I'm a very strong person, but this is hard. Wicked hard. Any information would be helpful. Thanks.

[snusjus]

Sounds like you're quitting alcohol, perhaps? When I quit I did it cold turkey, no shrinks or meetings involved.

[tom502]

I saw one for a short while, and as a kid my mom made us all get family counseling. I don't think it really "helped" me, but I do see it as something that can help people, as it's nice to just have a stranger you can let out with anything that's troubling you. It seems letting stuff out, helps to put it in perspective rather than just keep it all in. Having a good friend to share with helps too.

[truthwolf1]

booze?
Some people just cannot turn off the stop drinking switch or feel they need the booze to just function normally. THe first one is easier to overcome if you can stop yourself from drinking but the second one will take a good week or two of withdrawls. For me in one case of getting heavily drunk for a entire summer I had about a month of anxiety and hallucinations while stopping. I remember at the time wanting to see a shrink but went to a doctor instead who just plainly told me once I stopped boozing my mind would come back.
He was right and I went sober for about a year and never drank that heavily or consistently again. I still drink but I catch myself now before I go into black out/sick mode or any chance of a major hangover. Dealing with a two year old the next day just does not make that a option anymore.

[Mr. Snuffleupagus]

Can't really help you, but wanted to say good luck with your struggle. I really should quit drinking, but I keep putting it off.

[tom502]

I have always been able to drink excessively, but keep it occasionally, like only Friday or Saturday night. And not every week either, maybe twice a month.

[sgreger1]

PM Sent.

[ratcheer]

I have used both psychologists and psychiatrists at various times in my life. You should not reject them out-of-hand. There are good ones and bad ones, just like any other profession. My advice is, if you are getting along with a particular one and he is really helping you deal with your problems, by all means continue working with him (or her). Conversely, if a particular one does not click for you, you are under no obligation to continue with him. Just go find another one.

If you are worried about what anyone else thinks, just keep it to yourself. Your relationship with them is completely confidential. But, if you need help, get it.

Tim

[WickedKitchen]

Well, it's not booze. I don't really like getting drunk and I can't even remember the last time I tied one on.

Firstly, I have much apprehension about going to see someone because of what one of them did to my brother and family 25 years ago. I remember thinking that it just didn't make sense and that it was wrong at the time. When I got older I asked my parents what happened and they confirmed my suspicions. I think it scarred my brother but I've got to deal with my issues first. He still doesn't think that he has a problem and he's stable so his time will come when he's ready.

The other problem I have seeing someone is that my entire life I've been told how I should feel. How I should think. How I should behave. When I called to make the appointment today I got the receptionist. She asked me a few questions and I had to tell her that I don't feel good about going to see this person. She immediately answered that I should feel good about it. I would have preferred to start on the other foot.

Another thing is that I believe that my wife is the one I should lean on. She helps me through everything but she doesn't believe that I can do it alone because I've used it for 13 years. I've quit other things around her. She also thinks the world of this profession. There's been shrinks in her life since childhood. She believes that talking to a stranger is good. I think it's totally weird. I mean, I want someone to help me that knows me. It's going to take a long time for anyone to get enough background info on me to make any sort of meaningful suggestion. I don't think it'll work if I see this person once per week 'cos that'll take months. In fact, I've quit harder things...things with stronger physical withdrawals so I don't believe that I need any help like this but I also recognize that that is exactly how an addict thinks. In order to protect my wife's belief in me she feels I must go see this person. I know she and I can do this together but she doesn't. Again, I'm being told how I "should" handle this situation and that part makes me angry.

I'm ok with the withdrawals, I mean I'm confident I can do this. I've quit nicotine cold turkey and chose to go back to it. I quit coffee cold turkey and though I do enjoy it I don't have the physical need for it. I quit cocaine. That shit was hard. I did do it long really but man, those DT's were something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Again, I did it cold turkey. This one really only has insomnia. I'm physically blitzed but mentally awake. I know it'll past and it won't even take that long. Another side effect is weight loss. I'm absolutely psyched about that (no pun intended) and though I haven't gotten on a scale I can already see that I've shed a few pounds.

I really just need to change the addicts way of thinking in order to change the self destructive behavior or change the behavior in order to change the mentality. Hopefully one begets the other. I don't want one quitting one thing to lead to another self-destructive pattern. I need to remove the negative stimulus in my life or find a different way to deal with them. I already know why I think this way and where it originally comes from. I know what feeds it now. I know that it's a complete choice for me to use and in the last month or so I've begun to realize that it's not real fun anymore. It's just a part of life. So I quit, cold turkey, just like the way I think it should be. My head is so friggin' clear right now it's not funny. I haven't felt this mentally clear in 13 years. I just haven't slept more than 8 total hours in about 5 nights. i've journaled and I've got dozens of pages of my sole that I probably will give to my family. I've already told my brother and his wife. I'm ready now. I never was in the past, but I'm certain of it now. I've got plenty of friends to talk to about this. Plenty that will genuinely help me. I have some that will think I'm nuts but good for them.

[jamesstew]

I've been gone for a week. I'm going through a personal struggle right now. I'm talking addiction and breaking it, and I'm also not talking about nicotine. The withdrawals are terrible. It's not like cocaine or heroine or anything but it's very hard to deal. Sleep has been almost non existent for a week now.

I have a very loving and supportive wife, thank God. I wouldn't want to do it without her support.

My question is: Does anyone have experience with a psychologist?

I will be making an appointment to see one soon to make sure I'm on the right track with my personal healing but I don't know what to expect. I have a very negative outlook on this as my family had a bad experience with one when I was a child and my brother had a problem. It's blackened the profession for me yet I can't say that I have firsthand knowledge of how the sessions actually work. I only know what I've been told. I think that I'm a very strong person, but this is hard. Wicked hard. Any information would be helpful. Thanks.

Best of luck to you Sr. Kitchen. At least you're making that first step and with some perseverance you can get through this.

[Bigblue1]

Screw a psychologist. From everything I've ever read from you, I am sure of one thing, and that is that you are a strong Man. I'm pretty sure I know what your quitting, and if you already licked coke you should have no problem not smoking up. I'm assuming tho this need or want to quit is coming from somewhere, there's always outside forces that push us when it comes to these matters. If It truly is just a lack of sleep, and you fell you need to get a few more hours, go buy some benadryl, 2 an hour before you want to sleep and you will. Also check out valerian root it's pretty effective...... legal, and safe......

[PipenSnus]

Approach medical care, physical or mental, the same way you would approach any other service you are paying for. Be an informed consumer. If you don't feel comfortable with this psychologist, find another. Be completely candid about your skepticism and reservations, and don't follow any course of therapy that doesn't feel right to you. It's your life, no one else has a right to make decisions for you. A good therapist will respect that right.

Good luck, WK. Call on us for support if you need to.

[LaZeR]

I have used both psychologists and psychiatrists at various times in my life. You should not reject them out-of-hand. There are good ones and bad ones, just like any other profession. My advice is, if you are getting along with a particular one and he is really helping you deal with your problems, by all means continue working with him (or her). Conversely, if a particular one does not click for you, you are under no obligation to continue with him. Just go find another one.

If you are worried about what anyone else thinks, just keep it to yourself. Your relationship with them is completely confidential. But, if you need help, get it.

Tim

Good advice. Good luck Wicked and don't be ashamed to get help if you know you need it!

[Roo]

Best of luck WK. I have never seen a shrink myself, but my only advice is to try it once and first see how you get along with the shrink, then if you like and trust the person, keep your mind open and evaluate ther perspective and its effects on your thinking after a couple visits. Sometimes seeing things from a differnt angle, one that comes from an observer outside of your situation, is immensely helpful.

[Randall]

The only advice I have, which you are free to disregard, is to find a shrink that is interested in the here and now. Not disecting your whole life up til now.