Old and Busted: "Jobs saved or created". New Hotness: "Lives Touched"

[sgreger1]

It isn’t simply the absurdity of a recent Government Accountability Report (GAO), finding that each job ‘created’ by the stimulus bill costsan average of $194,213. It’s the fundamental shell game that the administration is playing with the public regarding the numbers, a game that can only be interpreted one of two ways – either the administration itself is inept in their reporting, or they assume the American people are too inept to catch on.

Now however, the GAO report shows that the phrase ‘jobs created’ or ‘jobs saved’ is no longer the term of choice. They have decided to go with – wait for it – ‘lives touched’.

So what exactly defines a touched life?
A spokesperson from the CH2M Hill Plateau Remediation Company explains:

“Lives Touched” is a figure that the U.S. Department of Energy (DOE) uses to track the amount of people who have been positively affected by the Recovery Act funds. This total would include people who have been provided full time employment (i.e. saved and created jobs) through the Recovery Act and people who at some point have supported a project funded by the Recovery Act.

In other words, the administration has stumbled upon another way to inflate their job numbers. They were already reporting on those saved or created, but will now include ‘people who at some point have supported a project.’


Additionally, the report states that, “The lives touched headcount will remain the same or increase over time as new workers become involved with ARRA contracts. The total headcount will never decrease.”


In other words, a temporary, part-time, or seasonal worker can come into a project, work no more than one hour on said project, and that person will continue to appear in the headcount with each report. They will not be removed upon their departure from the project.







This is almost as funny as when Obama tried to rename "terrorist attacks" to "manmade disasters". lollolol


/fake numbers are fake
//fake names are faker

[NonServiam]

You know I had a strange dream the other night. Of course, a person's dreams are always so much more interesting to the dreamer than to the person having to hear about it.

Anyways, I dreamt about a bunch of politicians pulling money out of their pockets and counting it in front of everybody to show that everything was accounted for and there was no funny business going on. Then I looked a little bit closer and realized that the fatheads were actually sitting on a huge mountain of money! They looked like Scrooge McDuck in his vault. Hmmmmm........