Nine words women use....and how men should translate them

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  • Premium Parrots
    Super Moderators
    • Feb 2008
    • 9759

    Nine words women use....and how men should translate them

    NINE WORDS WOMEN USE
    (1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

    (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

    (3)Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

    (4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

    (5) Loud Sigh: This isn't actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

    (6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

    (7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').

    (8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying GO TO HELL

    (9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # (3.)
    Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I killed because they were annoying......





    I've been wrong lots of times.  Lots of times I've thought I was wrong only to find out that I was right in the beginning.


  • Tobakssmak
    Member
    • Jan 2010
    • 263

    #2
    You've finally cracked the code. Brilliant.

    Comment

    • truthwolf1
      Member
      • Oct 2008
      • 2696

      #3
      All the refer to #numbers have lost me.

      Comment

      • tom502
        Member
        • Feb 2009
        • 8985

        #4
        That was funny(and true).

        Comment

        • c.nash
          Banned Users
          • May 2010
          • 3511

          #5
          I've seen this before and it is definatly 100% true. lol

          Comment

          • sgreger1
            Member
            • Mar 2009
            • 9451

            #6
            The accuracy of this document is such that we should print it on ultra thin paper, bind it, and protect it for thousands of years like it was the bible. It's the only reference to go by, without it we are lost! If it gets destroyed or lost to the ages, future generations will lose knowledge of man's crowning achievement, cracking the female code.

            Comment

            • raptor
              Member
              • Oct 2008
              • 753

              #7
              misogyny! yay!

              Comment

              • visiON
                Member
                • Mar 2010
                • 308

                #8
                Originally posted by sgreger1 View Post
                The accuracy of this document is such that we should print it on ultra thin paper, bind it, and protect it for thousands of years like it was the bible. It's the only reference to go by, without it we are lost! If it gets destroyed or lost to the ages, future generations will lose knowledge of man's crowning achievement, cracking the female code.
                The paper will most likely get destroyed by pot heads using it as rolling paper..

                Comment

                • bill77.017
                  Member
                  • Jul 2010
                  • 2279

                  #9
                  Wise words indeed!

                  Comment

                  • c.nash
                    Banned Users
                    • May 2010
                    • 3511

                    #10
                    Originally posted by visiON View Post
                    The paper will most likely get destroyed by pot heads using it as rolling paper..

                    Haha.. That reminds me of a guy.

                    When he used to run out and couldn't get to the store (this was back in middle school), he would grab a bible or book or morman or any book of worship (I know, terrible right?) and use the back empty pages to roll his shit.

                    He's probably going to hell haha!

                    Comment

                    • Premium Parrots
                      Super Moderators
                      • Feb 2008
                      • 9759

                      #11
                      Originally posted by c.nash View Post
                      Haha.. That reminds me of a guy.

                      When he used to run out and couldn't get to the store (this was back in middle school), he would grab a bible or book or morman or any book of worship (I know, terrible right?) and use the back empty pages to roll his shit.

                      He's probably going to hell haha!
                      whats his name? I'll tell him you said hello when I get there.
                      Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I killed because they were annoying......





                      I've been wrong lots of times.  Lots of times I've thought I was wrong only to find out that I was right in the beginning.


                      Comment

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