My ultimatum to the EU parliament

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  • squeezyjohn
    Member
    • Jan 2008
    • 2497

    My ultimatum to the EU parliament

    I have my last portion of snus in at the moment ... because you have made it illegal for me to buy I am looking in to the alternatives you sanction as a legal way to enjoy tobacco.

    I can smoke, but I've heard you can die of bad cancer from doing that. I know you kept that legal - so it must be safe right?

    So I am allowed to buy "chewing tobacco" in various forms including fire-cured / fermented forms with TSNA levels much much higher than those in snus. I am also allowed to cut these twist tobaccos finely myself and use just as I would use a long-cut snus although this home made snus would be much more dangerous and is likely to contain sugar which could rot my teeth.

    So I am allowed to buy snuff (also known as nasal snuff) - provided the levels of moisture when bought are low enough. With this snuff I can pasteurise it and add my own moisture and flavourings and create los snus - but with unknown levels of TSNA whereas genuine Swedish made snus is tested rigorously for it's safety.

    So I am allowed to buy as many packets of Nicorette patches as I like (provided I have enough money!) - I can then put all of them on and die of nicotine poisoning - I don't want to do that - but the EU allows me to do so.

    So I can buy a packet of 20 Rothmans cigarettes and rip the filters off and just eat the cigarettes (I find the filters are too chewy) - when I do this I find I generally feel very sick and sometimes actually vomit. From my bodies reaction I assume this is not very good for my health - or I am allergic to cigarettes. Yet the EU allow me to buy these freely from any shop if I am over the age of 18*.

    When I'm really desperate because I cannot buy this seemingly safe snus due to EU regulations I sometimes buy a pouch of St. Bruno pipe tobacco from the local shop and make it in to a strong tea. Then I get my trusty pipe which I have sharpened at the end usually used for putting in the mouth - and I insert the sharp end in to my main vein in the left arm (I'm right handed) - I then proceed to pour my strong Nicotea™ in to the pipe and mainline my drug of choice. Last time I very nearly died due to an air bubble getting in to my circulatory system and causing the heart to fail. Yet the EU allows me to buy a pipe, a pencil sharpener and pipe tobacco - don't they know that this is really dangerous?

    I still can't buy a can of little paper pouches of the safest tobacco product known to man.

    If anyone from the EU parliament is reading this: I have run out of snus - I am sharpening my pipe and my family have been primed to sue the hell out of you if I die from not using snus but using the ridiculous alternatives you somehow allow to remain legal.

    Sincerely

    Squeezy
    Squeezyjohn

    Sometimes wrong and sometimes right .... but ALWAYS certain!!!
  • Skell18
    Member
    • May 2012
    • 7067

    #2
    Well said mate! I need to correct one thing though, its 18 to buy tobacco not 16, changed a few years ago

    Comment

    • Frosted
      Member
      • Mar 2010
      • 5798

      #3
      Originally posted by Skell18
      Well said mate! I need to correct one thing though, its 18 to buy tobacco not 16, changed a few years ago
      Yeah, but if you buy tobacco at 16 you'll die. If you're 18 you won't.

      Comment

      • Mordred
        Member
        • Dec 2009
        • 342

        #4
        What do you expect from a totalitarian system run by morons? Support the hell out of UKIP, at least in your country, there is some resistance the the EU madness. Here in Luxembourg, the only party that somewhat opposes the EU are the communists and that's because they think the EU isn't going far enough yet.

        Comment

        • heders
          Member
          • Jan 2011
          • 2227

          #5
          Can't we all send that exact same letter but with different signatures? It will be a greater chance that they actually read it if a lot of people send it.

          Comment

          • GN Tobacco Sweden AB
            Member
            • Mar 2011
            • 7035

            #6
            Christofer Fjelner is Swedish MP who can receive your letter
            Here are his contact details


            per.heister@europarl.europa.eu
            Arb: +3222842697
            Mobil: +32496645530
            Mobil: +46736828090

            Comment

            • alexdal
              Member
              • May 2011
              • 74

              #7
              Originally posted by Skell18
              Well said mate! I need to correct one thing though, its 18 to buy tobacco not 16, changed a few years ago
              maybe in UK, in Italy and other southern nations is between 14 and 16, in Italy it's forbidden sell to under 16, and you have double fines is you smoke in a no smoking place with under 12y.o.
              between 13 and 15 you can smoke with no problem (if someone else buy cigs to you)

              But snus are forbidden and snuff and chewing no one want sell them. In the past we used to produce snuff but since British Tobacco bought the Italian Tobacco State Company (Monopoli del Tabacco) stopped to produce snuff.

              Comment

              • Skell18
                Member
                • May 2012
                • 7067

                #8
                Originally posted by alexdal
                maybe in UK, in Italy and other southern nations is between 14 and 16, in Italy it's forbidden sell to under 16, and you have double fines is you smoke in a no smoking place with under 12y.o.
                between 13 and 15 you can smoke with no problem (if someone else buy cigs to you)

                But snus are forbidden and snuff and chewing no one want sell them. In the past we used to produce snuff but since British Tobacco bought the Italian Tobacco State Company (Monopoli del Tabacco) stopped to produce snuff.
                It was for the UK mate as John is from the UK, I remember a lot of pissed off 16 yr old chavs not behing able to buy their shitty lamberts when it came in, for once I was pro an anti smoking measure as I got a great deal of pleasure watching scum suffer! hahahaha

                Comment

                • whalen
                  Member
                  • May 2009
                  • 6593

                  #9
                  It sometimes helps to use what we Americans refer to as a "two by four" to get their full and undivided attention first!
                  wiki "Popcorn Sutton" a true COOT!

                  Comment

                  • hokiehi82
                    Member
                    • Jul 2012
                    • 227

                    #10
                    Buford Pusser style! I like it.

                    Comment

                    • whalen
                      Member
                      • May 2009
                      • 6593

                      #11
                      Buford Could straighten this out in record time! His was a truly unique negotiating style. Quite effective arguments.
                      wiki "Popcorn Sutton" a true COOT!

                      Comment

                      • hokiehi82
                        Member
                        • Jul 2012
                        • 227

                        #12
                        Originally posted by whalen
                        Buford Could straighten this out in record time! His was a truly unique negotiating style. Quite effective arguments.

                        He was a special kind of crazy that only us Americans can seem to master. Brings a tear to my eye.

                        Comment

                        • Frosted
                          Member
                          • Mar 2010
                          • 5798

                          #13
                          Originally posted by whalen
                          It sometimes helps to use what we Americans refer to as a "two by four" to get their full and undivided attention first!
                          ..LOL...

                          That's how I activate the ' off' switch located at the back of my wifes head.

                          Comment

                          • Skell18
                            Member
                            • May 2012
                            • 7067

                            #14
                            I know its been posted but:

                            http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-19964248

                            We are winning the war!!

                            Comment

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