So what's going on with this contest?
Grovsnus fans, read this thread
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Hmmm... zombies?
Like Rodney Dangerfield, I'm a lover, not a fighter. Hence, on my own, I wouldn't be much help.
But in a pinch, I'd whip out the cell phone and text Chuck Norris.
As you know, zombies wouldn't rip Chuck's arms and legs off. Chuck would rip off his own limbs and force-feed them to the zombies until they puked. And then HE would eat the zombies... and their puke... and then eat the zombies' families and all their friends... and anyone who looked like a zombie (look out, Al Gore)... then wash it all down with a beer... and still have enough energy to do a "Mike Huckabee for President" campaign commercial.
I can't think of anyone I'd rather have on my side...
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just go here for all the info you will need lol
http://www.snuson.com/viewtopic.php?p=42941#42941 8)
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Ok, so after I made my last post I obsessed about 'who else' I might have along-side to fight zombies assuming Chuck was busy doing ab-machine info-mercials.
Out of nowhere this song hit me.... "He never gives up, he stay tills the fights won"... over and over until I could place it. I was trying to pin it to an individual... and, for some reason, had it grammatically incorrect. I guess that's how I remember it from when I was a kid. Singing to myself "correctly" just doesn't sound right.
[queue somber music]
And now... those memories I have for so long suppressed have surfaced and I have no choice but to confront them.
Back in 1984, my little brother and I (being 8 and 10 respectively) were avid fans and collectors of G.I. Joe. By "avid", I mean we had 3 hover-crafts, a Hydro-plane, 2 Conquest X-30's, 2 F1-Tomcats, an A10-Thunderbolt, numerous desert-service vehicles and even an older motorcyle with a side-cart. We had Duke, Flint, Ace, Scarlett, Alpine, Bazooka, Gung-Ho, Road-Block, and Destro, Cobra Commander, the twins Tomax and Xamot, Zartan, the Baroness and Dr. Mindbender (among others).
But most of all I remember this guy called "Clutch". He wasn't a major character. He just drove the car. He was the hero behind the hero. He was the little guy who helped when and where he could. He was responsible for getting the heroes away from danger after they'd done their service for their country.
On the other hand, Clutch seemed to get along well with this sailor character named "Shipwreck" who carried a parrot on his shoulder, but otherwise had an uncanny resemblance to a local dentist who had been charged with child-molestation...
Ok, so, um... Zartan could change color in sunlight... though he turned "blue" and I was never quite certain how exactly that would serve as good camouflage in Louisiana...
OMG... and then there was that whole "Serpentor" thing, remember? The guy resurrected using DNA from Genghis Khan, Napoleon, Julius Caesar, etc....
So, as my childhood was about to be really ****ed up... along came Storm Shadow, the Ninja. He made it all right again.
There is nothing quite so spiritually and emotionally balancing to a twelve-year-old as a cold, heartless assassin dressed in white.
So I guess my point is... as a second choice, if Chuck was busy, I'd text Storm Shadow to fight the zombies. At least he has swords and throwing-stars and shit.
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Swords are pretty cool, especially a well made katana. And someone who can actually use one would make short work of the undead. Throwing stars don't penetrate deep enough to cause significant damage, and they don't pierce through the thick bone making the skull to destroy the brain. Not a bad choice though. But I'm the official Battalion Zombie Slayer. XP >=3
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