+25000.00 Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed there for a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it, but Bill said he would be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own. One day a few weeks later, Bill came home and his wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong. 'What's wrong,Bill?' she asked. 'Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer?' 'Oh, Bill, you didn't ' she exclaimed. 'Yes, I did.' he replied. 'My God, Bill, what happened?' 'I got fired.''No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?' 'Oh... she got fired too.'
you do realize what we do with lame dogs here don't ya?
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I killed because they were annoying......
I've been wrong lots of times. Lots of times I've thought I was wrong only to find out that I was right in the beginning.
You know, after I read it today (sober)...I thought to myself he's probably joking cause his name is Snusdog...I need to lay off the hooch...Ya right, who am I kidding...
You know, after I read it today (sober)...I thought to myself he's probably joking cause his name is Snusdog...I need to lay off the hooch...Ya right, who am I kidding...
yea.....less love for the hooch and more love for the pooch.
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I killed because they were annoying......
I've been wrong lots of times. Lots of times I've thought I was wrong only to find out that I was right in the beginning.
Sounds like my solution! I have come from one dog to six in the three years plus I have not touched a drop. Give me credit fellow snus ers. I'm 60 and it took me 6 years to get 3 plus sober! It was serious hopelessness here and I hope nobody ever has to go there. So if you love your hooch treat it with respect or it'll knock your lights out change your personality and ability to cope and insidiously ruin your life that becomes a pit to slowly crawl out of and maybe not open up again. And that's not a joke. Plus I save money too. Heh heh
+$2,000 or -$2,000 A couple returns from their honeymoon refusing to speak to each other. The groom's best friend takes him aside and asks what's wrong."Well," replies the man, "when we finished making love on the first night, I put a $50 bill on the pillow without thinking."
"Oh, you shouldn't worry about that too much," says his friend. "I'm sure your wife will get over it soon enough. She can't expect you to have been saving yourself all these years."
"That's not the problem, " the groom says. "She gave me $20 change!"
An Irish drunk staggered down the main street of the town. Somehow he managed to make it up the stairs to a cathedral and into the entrance, where he crashed from pew to pew, finally making his way to a side aisle and into a confessional. A priest had observed all this, and figured the fellow needed some help, so he entered his side of the confessional. After the priest sat there in deathly silence, he finally asked, "May I help you, my son?" "I dunno," came the drunk's voice from behind the partition. "You got any paper on your side?"
Oh, and thank you Mr. Parrots! Got my prize today. : -) Been waiting a long time to try Extreme Cold, yum! Now if Mr. GN would send my prize...my broke ass would be set!
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